Lonely and Overworked in Louisiana

Dear Ms. Money:

My fiancé and I have a business which is going rather well. Lately I've noticed that his heart doesn't seem to be in the company anymore. He leaves early, comes in late, and doesn't really have his mind on his responsibilities. What should I do? I'm afraid if I point out his unprofessional behavior, it will wreck our wedding plans. LONELY AND OVERWORKED IN LOUISIANA

Dear Lonely:

Are you sure you have the right advice columnist?

During business hours, Ms. Money would advise you to treat this wayward partner just like any other member of your executive management team. Would you tolerate such behavior from your accountant or sales manager? Ms Money thinks not. After hours, have a heart-to-heart talk with your honey, it sounds as if your worker bee is already buzzing up another hive.

Graciously,
Ms. Money

Confused in Conneticut

Dear Ms Money:

I'm starting a company, and I've been working on the financial section of my business plan for months, and there seems to be no end to it! I've built this monster-sized financial model on my computer, and what with the P&L forecast, the balance sheets, the cash flow forecasts, and whatnot, I'm up to 42 pages. I know investors need all this to make an informed decision, but this seems like overkill. Have I done too much? Should I stop now? Should I forecast five years out, or three? CONFUSED IN CONNETICUT

Gracious Reader:

Entrepreneurs certainly do get carried away with their forecasts...Ms Money gets roughly ten business plans in the mail per week, and the paper piles up so fast in her office that she had to invest in a gadget that compacts the documents into lovely, long-burning fire logs (the ink makes very colorful flames). For a start-up company all forecasts are essentially a fantasy, you see. So, if you are the investor, would you rather read a sprightly novella of a business plan, or ponderous epic of War & Peace proportions?

I'd suggest you go back to your model, cut out all the "whatnot," and stick to the basics.

The key question is, how long will it take until your business no longer requires the investors' money and generates positive cash flow? And the second thing to keep in mind is making sure you have clearly presented the assumptions behind your (simplified) financial model. Even a fantasy can have a framework.

Also, the further out you go in time, the less detailed your forecast needs to be. The chances of accurately predicting where a start-up company will be five years later are about the same as the possibility of Ms Money being seen having a power lunch at your local hamburger joint. So, when you try to save your spreadsheet and the computer says, "disk full," it's time to stop playing with numbers and get back to work.

Graciously,
Ms. Money

Wilting in Washington State

Dear Ms Money:

Last year, my wife started a new business venture. Like many small companies, hers did not have enough capital to start with, and it has taken way longer to get the product to market than she had anticipated. My problem is that she is becoming such a stingy penny-pincher, I can't stand it anymore. This winter, she told me that we shouldn't use the heater, until the temperature in the house got below 60 degrees; that we needed "every nickel to go into the business." Do you know how cold you can get when you're in your boxer shorts and it's 60 degrees? Can't even watch ESPN sports. I think this is really unfair. It's her d@mn company, after all. She wasn't like this at all when we got married, by the way. I didn't expect to have to put up with all these hardships just so she could pursue his dream. I'm used to the good life. Call me, WILTING IN WASHINGTON STATE

Gracious Reader:

When you got married, did the ceremony go like this, "For better or worse, richer or poorer, but keep your hands off my thermostat, pal?"

No, I didn't think so. And I believe, from a purely technical standpoint, you shouldn't say, "it's her d@mn company," but rather, "it's our d@mn company." Remember when she took out that bank loan, and there was the formality of having your signature on the document, too? Congratulations, you're in debt along with her, up to your eyeballs or other body parts Ms Money is too demure to mention. Since you own part of this venture, why don't you try making the best of the experience? In most start-ups, there are far too many things to do and not enough hours in the day.

Maybe you have some skills or talents that could be of use in getting the company going. Perhaps you took some marketing courses in college. (Or did you just major in whining?). Then, years from now, when the company is a big success, you can call it, "our success."

Ms. Money

Talkative in Tennessee

Dear Ms Money:
I've bought a telephone listing of wealthy individuals, at least that's what they're supposed to be, and plan on calling them to find investors for my new product. An acquaintance of mine did this and said it really was effective. Can you help me with the script for this cold calling? TALKATIVE IN TENNESSEE

Gracious Reader:
Dialing for dollars is for dumb-dumbs. Were you aware that what you plan on doing is breaching federal and state securities laws, never mind that it's rude? One can not solicit for investors without being properly registered. (Even in that certain county in Nevada, the solicitors must be registered, but that's another story).

Ms Money suggests you leave your acquaintance's method out in the cold, otherwise you just might effectively find yourself in the Securities and Exchange Commission's office and not even Ms Money could script your way out of that.

Ms. Money

Family Fun in Fargo

Dear Ms Money:
My sister, my brother-in-law, my husband and I are thinking of going into business together. If we pool our savings, we have enough money to purchase this wonderful 50-seat Italian restaurant in our neighborhood. We all get along so well--we spend nearly every weekend together--and our friends all love our cooking--that it seems a natural for us to do. What are the pros and cons of going into business with relatives? FAMILY FUN IN FARGO

Gracious Reader:
Oh, there are pros? I wasn't aware of any. I'll have to check around and find out. Ms Money has her own Theory of Relativity: it goes: related individuals + business stress + hard work + long hours = inevitable disaster. The theory works no matter how close or how friendly the relatives are. Ms Money has an older sister, a smashingly gorgeous woman. We both got Master's Degrees, graduating with honors from a prestigious Eastern university, and though we both set out to make a fortune, we were smart enough to not work together in the same field. I entered finance and am working on the becoming a multi-millionaire. She married one. Both are valid approaches to achieving wealth.

Ms. Money

Lazy in Lubock

Dear Ms Money:
My company is just starting out and doesn't qualify for bank financing, and my personal credit is a little shaky as well. I don't have any funds of my own, and I don't want to bring in an investor or a partner, why should I share the profits? I've heard that there are grants that I can get from the government that will help me get going. Where can I apply? LAZY IN LUBOCK

Gracious Reader:
Welfare for the we wanna be in business? Is that the program you're referring to? Ms Money knew that the entitlement mentality was going to fall to this level eventually. Why oh why, would the government just dole out dollars for delinquents like you? What you should be applying, is not for a freebie from the feds, but your backside to hard work and perseverance in building up your business on your own efforts. While there are grants, such as the Small Business Innovation Research grants, they are awarded competitively, (an activity Ms, Money does not believe you are familiar with) not on the basis of need or want.

Ms. Money

Drowning in Detroit

Dear Ms Money:
I'm president and founder of a $50 million a year distribution company that has grown like crazy over the last five years. As we've gotten bigger, so have the stacks of financial reports, industry surveys and other information on my desk. I never get caught up on all that reading--even taking the reports home at night and on weekends-- and I still feel as though I don't really have my fingers on the company's pulse. What can I do about this information overload? DROWNING IN DETROIT

Gracious Reader:
Yes, yes, we live in the "Age of (mostly useless) Information", where the new business status symbol is how much data you can collect. Some sage advice comes to us from a gentleman named Henry David Thoreau, who said, "Simplify, simplify." This was easy for him to say, of course, because he didn't have a laptop and cell phone with him at Walden Pond. Nonetheless, you're just cluttering up your mind with meaningless statistics and dubious data, diverting your attention from the real management issues concerning your business. A dear friend of mine, who runs a vastly successful electronics company, and a strategic genius (though a tragically inferior bridge player I must add) keeps tract of things with a ONE PAGE report he receives each morning containing the key indicators of his business' performance. By not generating all that paper, his mind is free and he saves many a tree.

Ms. Money